The don’t be a d**k rule

Warning, expletives extensively used throughout this post.

I took a car trip with a friend not long ago and we started discussing former colleagues and school mates and how you don’t get to choose who you spend your days with. I explained to him that I strive to live by the don’t be a dick rule, a rule related to the golden one – one should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself – just with a more direct approach.

You see, I believe that we are all born with a sense of altruism and respect for others, but time and grown up dicks then turn some of us into dicks (or cunts, but let’s focus here).

Did you know that there are two main kind of dicks – some that revel in the fact that they’re dicks and make it their whole personality and some who don’t even realize they’re dicks. Dicks also tend to attract other dicks, and once one dick is out swinging others often take that as a signal that it’s ok to be a dick as well. But the funny thing is that dicks don’t really enjoy each other’s company. When two or more dicks meet, they most often try to out-dick each other and it just turns into a dick-fest.

Now more dicks tend to rear their ugly heads when the economy goes down. And we now have a situation where a lot of previous limp dicks are behaving like full fledged dicks, because they think that since a small number of newly arrived dicks do dickish things, that means that all of them should be treated as dicks. 

Don’t be a dick – or at least don’t whip it out and show it in public.


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